What the F#%*K Just Happened?!

I leave the maternity ward on shaky legs and slump to the hospital pharmacy. My sweaty hand slides a prescription over the counter.

“First baby?”
I nod gingerly.
“How old are you?”
I hold up three fingers, shrug.
“You look older.”
I nod again. I know I looked younger on the way in, much younger.
“Congratulations.”
I slowly pull a clutch of my new grey hair from my head - it comes out in clumps - and wave it under her nose.
“You see what happens here?” I growl.

The pharmacist twirls her semi-bleached mustache, emits an evil Spanish laugh: “Jajajajajajajajajajaja!”

And it begins… my journey deep into the jungle of parenthood.